The Three F's of Coping with Sickle Cell - Friends

When I talk with people about the things I endure, the question I'm frequently asked is, "how do you cope with it all?" I find it a difficult question to answer, yet simple at the same time. The answer is, "I just do." Living with a chronic illness from birth is different than developing one later in life. I've never known anything different than living with the daily, and unpredictable, complications of Sickle Cell. However, I do have to say that my family, faith, and friends are the three major gears that keep my coping machine in full operation.

In the posts entitled, "Safety Net" and "Building Relationships of Trust," I wrote about how important it is to surround yourself with good, positive, and supportive friends. I can't express enough how important it is to choose your friends carefully. I have always tried to befriend everybody around me. Whether they were a nerd or a jock, a cheerleader or a recluse--sadly, the cheerleaders never reached out to me--I always did my best to reach out to all; social or popularity status never mattered to me. But when it came to selecting close personal friends, I was/am very selective.

Negative people radiate negative energy. I have enough negative energy in my life that I daily combat. What I need in my life are positive people who radiate positive energy.  Keeping all 4-Points of my health...well...healthy, is vital to my well-being. I need to be around friends who make me laugh, and I can in turn make laugh; friends who share my spiritual beliefs; and friends I don’t have to hide the details of my health from.

All my life I’ve been blessed with no shortage of close personal friends. Many of those friendships died, others have remained. I have one friend named Mark; he and I have been friends for over twenty years. Though we live in separate States, he keeps in contact with me as much as I do him. I cherish his friendship more than words can express.

Some days, living with Sickle Cell is very challenging; it can be mentally, physically, emotional, and spiritually difficult to manage. A good friend can help lighten the heavy load that is our illness. Lean on your friends. Allow them to help. Talk with them about what's troubling you. They may or may not be able to relate to the hardships in your life, but they can listen; they can be there for you; they can give you their love. Allow your friends to help you cope with Sickle Cell the best they can.